It was… Work Day 7: Post 7 -- "You talking to me?"

~~ Robert De Niro as Travis Bickle in Taxi Driver

I call this piece….

My one-sided interview with Glamazon

Mrs. Hemsworth: Thank you for joining us this afternoon on the bus, Glamazon.  Let’s get right to it.  So your style is very…uh…unique.  Care to comment on that?

Glamazon: …

Mrs.H: No?  Okay…Where would one buy a very asymmetrical skirt in Pepto pink that has severe pilling?

G: …

Mrs. H: Not revealing your source eh?  Understandable.  Now I notice your high neck sweater is the exact shade of white as your patterned pantyhose and complexion.  What’s your secret?

G:….

Mrs. H: And I’ve noticed you’ve paired your ensemble with two-toned, pea soup green, shoes that are a cross between granny’s oxfords and granny’s mary janes.  Seriously…what were you thinking?

G: …

Mrs. H: Ahh….I get it .. you were going for quiet mystery.  Like, you’re staying quiet because it’s a mystery to you too what possessed you to wear them.  Intriguing!

Mrs. H: Now I can’t help but notice that you read a lot.  What would you say to your critics that would label you “a dumb blonde” -- referring of course to your recently bleached hair?

G: …

Mrs. H: Strong silent type eh?  I respect that.  Well thank you for sitting beside me on this bus.  It’s been enlightening. 

It was…Work Day 6: Post 6 -- Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get...

~~Forrest Gump

Happy record high heat day!!!  Woohoo!  Supposed to actually be 31 and feel like 41!!  Are you jealous??  I know you’re not…you’d suffer.  Unlike my homie the Office Supply Delivery Guy!  He likes it hot! We agree…if someone ain’t in respiratory distress from the heat…it’s not hot enough!!!

Lot’s of blogging fodder…and it’s only 0908.  Let’s call this segment…

Fashion Safari

The Loon (Thrifiticus Storicus)The Loon can be spotted obliviously “rocking” their thrift store finds in any situation.  Regardless of the setting, the temperature or the millenia, The Loon, is perfectly oblivious to their mad cap style.  They prefer to refer to themselves as “vintage” – I prefer to refer to them as crazy!

Case in point:  The girl with the pixie cut and thick, square rimmed black glasses wearing….wait for it…. a corduroy short sleeve dress, with a sliced green apple print and velvet trim. (I am not making this up!) She paired this curtain…sorry…dress, with faux leather, black wedge Mary Janes and bright red (we’re talking seen from space bright) opaque tights!!  Tights!!!!!!!!!  It’s 30 degrees!!!!!!!

The Skater Boi (Surprisicus Itsa Girlicous)

The messy, shapeless, unwashed hair.  The square shaped, ill fitting, message tee.  The board shorts.  The Birkenstocks.  You’re a girl.  Accept it.  If you want to dress like a 13 year old boy at least do so from the girls department.  They make the same clothes only it will fit your curves better.  Maybe you’ll get a date from one of your colleagues because of the effort instead of an invite to a sports bar.  Unless that’s your goal in which case – carry on.  We’re confused.

Highly Qualified (HO-monid Maximus)

No one wonders how she got her job…we are wondering how she manages to keep it.  Her attire is entirely inappropriate for work – that is any work that begins and ends before dark and doesn’t require an outdoor office ( a.k.a street) and mileage (a.k.a. walking).
Easily identified by the contrived, matchy matchy look that always terminates in a pair of high (a.k.a. hooker) heels .  Maybe we’d give you the benefit of the doubt if you didn’t stomp around the halls, yammering on your cell phone, with a perpetually bitchy pout at a snail’s pace, pretending not to notice all the looks you’re getting – be they good, bad or incredulous.

Okay, Okay...I fell off the blogging wagon

Allow me to go back in time then and publish the posts I meant to last week.  In my defence I was giddy with with excitement that Buffy had returned!  Considering her trip was the impetus for this blog I think I'm entitled to this mis-step.

But where does this blog go from here?  She's back...but there's plenty of fodder for this canon!  Stay tuned...